I’m still very angry and very depressed. The depression is heavyier than the anger at the moment.
I don’t want to talk to my friends or family. Mostly because I don’t trust them, and they can say “you can trust me” all they like, it’s not going to change things. Thanks to my mind, I find it hard to trust, and my thoughts and voices swirl around day and night. It drives me up the walls some times.
I just really dislike everyone at the moment and it’s best to stay away from me when I’m like this. Because I tend to self destruct really well.
Most people already don’t like me so there’s not many people left that do like me, so I really should be careful. However I can’t help but think ‘fuck it’ let them hate me too.
It’s also taking everything in me not to go out and buy a load of food and stuff my face, and then throw it all up. Because it usually makes me feel better…