Today my best friend asked me how I was doing. And after a catch up she asked me what I would do after my last therapy session, which ends in July. And it hit me, I have no idea. 

I am honestly scared. For the past year and a half I have been told not to work and to concentrate on therapy and getting ‘better’ 

But for the first time I’ve realised that I’m no where near stable enough to do the things that other people do on a daily basis. I can’t exspress how scared I am. I’m in and out of hospital and am in therapy most of my time at the moment. And I am only 21. I read Facebook posts about people I went to school with who have their life on track. They have jobs and are even saving up to buy a house. And here I am, recently having tried to kill myself, and can barely keep myself out of hospital alive. 

Fuck. 

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One thought on “Today reality hit me

  1. woah! calm down all you need is to dissolve your thoughts freaking out wont help, Like AT ALL so just thin what do you want to be and all that then try to get what you want don’t just sit there and hate life it wont help you and if you kill yourself you might hurt other people plus running away from life is NOT gonna help you always meet it whether its now or later, sorry if im a bit rough but im only trying to help

    Like

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